To save a life

I'm so proud of my son McKay this year.  He took lifeguard training in May when he turned 15 and has a job as a substitute guard for 10 pools in the area.  He has only worked at two of the pools but it has kept him pretty busy. 

He was super excited to get his first pay check and already has it spent!  Hopefully he'll save some of his second check!  I've been begging him for a picture and got this very unbecoming picture.  He just plain wouldn't pose for me.

I went over to the pool and got this picture of him when he couldn't stop me or walk away!  Isn't it a mom's job to embarrass their child? 

I felt bad for him the first few days he worked . . . . it was HIGH humidity and very hot.  Since then it hasn't been as bad.  I thought he'd quit those first few days and I wouldn't have blamed him, it was miserable.  I told him just to jump in the pool and cool off!  Maybe he's too worried about mussing his hair these days to actually do it!

The Candy Man Can

We have a long-standing relationship with the family that sits in front of us at church.  The mom is a recently reactivated church goer, the dad comes only occasionally because he isn't a member.  She has two sons.  Two sons that love my husband.  He plays with them on the sly, and helps to correct them when mom is having a hard time. 

Lincoln has a trick up his sleeve.  One that my kids know and one that many kids in the ward knows.  He keeps his scriptures brimming with candy.  He is ALWAYS good for a piece of candy at church.  He has become the honorary grandpa of our ward and subs in nursery quite a lot.  We'll walk down the halls of the church and nursery age kids hold out their arms to him and older kids ask him for a piece of candy.  Lincoln loves it!

Well . . . . mom who sits in front of us, just recently had a baby.  This baby is the cutest little thing!  Yesterday we watched in fascination as the new mom tried to juggle her two boys and the baby.  She tried letting one of the boys hold the baby and baby was having nothing to do with it.

I saw my chance!  I tapped new mom on the shoulder and held out my arms to take the baby.  Ahhhh! This was my territory!!!!  Well, new baby started to struggle and squirm and I couldn't calm her down!  With a twinkle in his eye, Lincoln held out his hands to take the baby from me!

What do you know?  Newborn Phoebe settled right in to Lincoln's arms and was quite cozy!  Wha?????  New mom turned around, gave me a questioning look and handed Lincoln a baby bottle, and he fed and put Phoebe to sleep.  Later, I told the new mom I'd like another chance to try my hand at holding little Phoebe and told her that Phoebe just wouldn't settle down with me.

New mom said . . . . . . "she's just buttering Brother Stevens up for the future candy she'll be getting" and we had a laugh!

The candy man can!!!

Flashback Friday

Journal Jar question:  "What was your favorite place to go with your family when you were young?"

This may seem kinda silly to some of you "girly girls" out there but I was not a girly girl!  One of my favorite things to do with our family was rock hounding. 

The county I'm from in Utah has a wealth of fossils and minerals . . . . . . . .  from the Millard County web page:  "The rugged desert mountains in Millard County Utah attract rockhounds from around the world. The Antelope Springs area is one of the best places in the world to find trilobites. Gem-quality topaz comes from Topaz Mountain. Sunstone Knoll is the place to find interesting sunstone. Countless other sites yield rare and interesting rocks, fossils and minerals."

This was my favorite fossil
to find by far!

I don't think I ever found a topaz,
but spent hours looking!

I have a box of fossils that we move from house to house.  When my husband hefts it he always asks, "are you ready to get rid of this yet?"  NOPE!  I'll get rid of most of my books before I'll part with that box of fossils and trilobites!  and that's saying something!

There's nothing quite like chipping away at a piece of shale and finding the treasure within . . . . .  opening an ugly rock and finding crystals inside . . . . . finding a piece of obsidian or snowflake obsidian . . . . . . finding an Indian arrowhead (which I guess is illegal now, really! would you just set it down again?!) . . . . . or finding a piece of topaz.  We've even been known to pan for gold.  My brothers have gotten more into the gold part, it doesn't hold much allure for me for some reason! 

It was always exciting to look
down and find one of these!

I guess I'm easy to please!  Just give me a pick and a pile of rocks and you'll keep me busy for hours! 

On the lighter side

I am addicted to exercising.  Seriously . . . . I love the serotonin.  I've exercised pretty consistently for the last 25 years.  I've added extra pounds during those years, but probably nothing to what they could have been :)

Except for bicycling, I exercise indoors.  The neighborhood in which I live is just not conducive to a lone, white woman walking the neighborhood.  So I don't, unless my husband is with me.

This year I decided to walk/jog around the church while McKay was attending seminary. 
I left my car unlocked . . . . purse in it . . . and because there were other parents snoozing in their cars, I felt safe.  It has been wonderful!  When you open your eyes and ears, (because, yes, I think it would be possible to miss all that is out there), the world is a pretty fascinating place. 

I've seen a lot of rabbits, that aren't scared of me in the least.  I can get within 4 to 5 feet of them and they just sit there.  I've seen feral cats, which are scared of me!  I've seen fuzzy caterpillars, turtles, horses, a multitude of birds, and on one morning nestled in the corn field next to the church were a couple of deer that popped up and bounded away.  I think they startled me as much as I them.  The air is full of bird chatter and is simply a joy to listen to.

Seminary has come to an end.

I decided I would walk in the neighboring neighborhood from me because my son has early morning swim team practice there.  This neighborhood is known to be worse than the one I live in.  I decided I would just walk the parking lot of the vacant school that stands in front of the pool.

A kubaton essentially turns your fist into a weapon. 
It's almost the same as having brass knuckles.
It can be a comfort!!!  Mine was a pretty red!!!!

Here I see different things every morning.  Two women who walk. . . . . one brandishing a big stick.  A big black man who walks with a golf club in one hand and his dog on a leash in the other.  Not a person walks without some form of club or another.  I wonder what that woman would do with her big stick if someone approached her?  It'd be interesting. 

They'd probably laugh if they knew I was trained in the use of a kubaton.  Problem is . . . . I had it taken away from me at a security checkpoint when it was recognized as a lethal weapon.  I don't know if it'd be lethal in my hands but I need to get another one.

I can't wait for seminary to start again so I can move my walking back to the church!!!  McKay would disagree with me I'm sure.

Perspective

The last three days has been a time of changing perspectives for me.

I think about every bite of food I put in my mouth.

I think about the roof over my head.

I think about the weather outside.

I think about air conditioning.

I think about my ability to run and jump into a car anytime I want.

I think about bathrooms and toilet paper and showers.

I think about fresh clean clothes.

I think of simple things, like computers and Internet one of the major ways to keep connected with loved ones.

I think about the safety of locked doors.

I'm thinking about many things.

Perspective . . . . . . . . it's a funny thing.

The hardest job in the world

Parenting . . . . the hardest job in the world.

Thoughts . . . . . . churning in my head . . . .

Blog pretty or not pretty . . . . . 

Keep your dirty laundry to yourself . . . . .

Protect children . . . . . protect husband . . . . . protect myself . . . . . .

Yesterday was one of the hardest days of my life . .. . . . .

By their fruits ye shall know them . . . . .

Men are free to choose . . . . liberty or death . . . . .

Agency . . . . . . . .

Books . . . . . . Love and Logic . . . . Loving Your Children too Much . . . . . . Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children . . . . . . . . The Bonds that Make Us Free . . . . . . . . The Power of a Positive Woman . . . . . The Joy of Having Children . . . . . When Your Child Wanders . . . . . and yes, The Scriptures (sometimes even they aren't very comforting) . . . . . .

Church talks with themes like . . . . . Just Be Happy . . . . . . Raise them right and you won't fail . . . . . . . . parenting (too late!) . . . . . . . Perception, it is everything . . . . . . church can be so hard.

Advice like . . . . . they'll come back . . . . . . love them . . . . . . everyone has a right to agency . . . . . they need to make their own choices . . . . . . . . you did your best . . . . . . returned missionaries and their proud parents (green eyed monster) . . . . . . . .

Somehow none of it does any good when you find out one of your children has been homeless and is living on the street for almost a week . . . . from his own choices . . . . . because the people in his life are trying to love him and help him make better choices . . . . . . . because he is being stupid right now.  He called for father's day, and said he's fine . . . . he's been panhandling and gets enough for food each day. . . . . He was crying and said "I don't want you to worry mom". . . . . .   IMPOSSIBLE . . . . . at least it is summertime . . . . . . .

and it's not the hardest job in the world?????  Words can't even say.

Sorry I'm Debbie Downer today . . . . . . . can't be up all the time.  Hopefully sharing can help someone else . . . . . or maybe not.  Tomorrow is another day . . . . . . . . . . .

Flashback Friday

Journal Jar question:  "Did you have a bicycle?  What was it like?"

Ahhhhh. . . . . bikes . . . . . .

I remember way back when I didn't even own a bike, before I could even ride a bike.  I dreamed about owning a bike.  It just looked like such a wonderful way to get around, peddling with wind blowing through your hair and magically staying upright on those two wheels.

I remember there was an older kid in our little neighborhood that would ride his bike in front of our house.  He seemed to have such freedom!  The bike I dreamed of was this one below . . . . . I wanted streamers though . . . . pink and white streamers that would flow from the ends of the handlebars . . . . .

A beloved "banana bike"!!!!

One Christmas morning I awoke to something like this . . . . .  . .


I don't remember mine ever having training wheels . . . . . . . just
learned "cold turkey" to ride the bike. . . . . . . . I could be wrong
though!  My memory isn't that great!

 I am ashamed of myself when I think back . . . . though I was pretty young.  I'm sure I didn't hide my disappointment at the ugly bike staring me in the face.  I don't remember much about it, or how long I finally took to swallow my pride and ride it. 

I remember my dad and mom running behind me trying to hold me up while I got my balance.  I remember not liking the feeling of not knowing when or if they would take their hands off the back of the seat and let me go . . . . . . .

One afternoon after begging my parents to help me ride and not getting any results I took off on my own to ride the bike.  I remember falling several times (we had gravel roads) and skinning up my knees, but my determination paid off and the freedom of bike riding was mine!  It was true! There was magic in being able to ride on two wheels!  What a rush.

Later in life a similar "bike" experience happened to me.  It was time for a new bike and this bike below is what I had in mind . . . . . . A beautiful ten speed with those awesome looking handle bars!  (now they make my back hurt just looking at them!)

One bright morning on my birthday I received something that looked kinda like this one below . . . . . . again I don't think I hid my disappointment well.

Oh let me count the ways!!!

I wanted a ten speed . . . . . . I got a three speed.

I wanted blue, maybe pink, maybe red . . . . . . . . I got a root beer brown.

I wanted those sleek looking handle bars . . . . . I got embarrassing looking ones.

I wanted to ride and pedal backwards to that lovely gear sound . . . . . pedaling backwards gave me my brake.

I wanted hand brakes . . . . . . . refer to above . . . . . . .

I wanted fenderless wheels . . . . . . . . I got fenders.

I took a screwdriver and took those fenders off . . . . I soon learned what they were for after getting flipped with water and mud up my backside while riding!

If I remember right I took that ugly chainguard off also, learning the hard way about the well-thought-out design of this bike. It sure looked nicer though!

I am somewhat ashamed of my nonacceptance of my parents efforts to make me happy (although I think they knew I wouldn't be :)  They did what they could afford, and what they thought was best for me.  I agree with them now. 
 
I think I learned a lot about swallowing my pride, and accepting with graciousness those gifts given to me.  I didn't learn these things right away, however!  If the truth be known, I'm stilling trying to learn those things.

I love to ride a bike.  It is really the only physical sport I like.  I don't own my own bike, however.  Lincoln rides Justin's bike and I ride Lincoln's bike . . . . . I really have no  complaints. .  . . . .it's red . . . . . has many speeds . . . . . . cool handlebars . . . . no fenders . . . . :)  it's a nice "bike store" bike . . . . . .  it is the best bike I've ever ridden. 

Maybe someday I'll get to pick out my own bike.

I'm not holding my breath!

Now I've seen it all . . .

Now I've seen it all . . . . . . today Lincoln left me his Miata because he needed to take a bunch of stuff to work and needed a car with more "stuff" space.  I thought McKay would love to go to seminary and school in it. 

We kept the top up on the drive to seminary . . . . . . but on the way to school I decided to put the top down.  By 7:00 a.m. it was already super hot and humid, and I thought the blowing air would be great! 

I needed to think again!  McKay whined and moaned and sat up close to the windshield because he didn't want to mess up his hair!!!  Give me a break!  If  "I" am willing to muss my hair, he with much shorter hair shouldn't mind either should he? (he could simply use his fingers to recomb I'm thinking) . . . . . but no!!! 

He has truly changed into a full-fledged teenager.  Unfortunately, I don't think my title is quite fair . . . . I think I am just beginning to see what McKay will hand me in the next few years!

Book of the month

 I don't know how it came about that we picked two "Asian" based books in two consecutive months, but I have to say I've enjoyed them both.  I have about 20 pages left of "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother" and if we don't have a lively discussion at book club about this book, I'd say we all need to have our pulses taken. . . . . .

This woman is crazy times two!   

This is a book on East vs. West . . . . . . Chinese (Asian) parenting, vs. Western (lazy) parenting.  Here is a sample of her battle hymn:

Her two daughters were never allowed to:

~attend a sleepover
~have a play date
~be in a school play
~complain about not being in a school play
~watch TV or own computer games
~choose their own extracurricular activities
~get any grade less than an A
~not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama
~play any instrument other than the piano or violin
~not play the piano or violin

I have to say that I was leery about reading this book.  The last thing I need is another guilt trip about my parenting techniques . . . . which the more I parent have declined to a "I don't know one thing about parenting."  I don't really think SHE knows the first thing about parenting either . . . . . but what is important is that she thinks she does! 

I couldn't believe some of the things I read in this book.  It had several jaw dropping moments for me. 

A VERY interesting read!!!

Nifty Nifty look whose . . . . . . .

Today, I can say that I'm officially married to a fifty year old!  Where does the time go to?

I remember when Lincoln turned 40.  It was harder on me that him.  I threw him a surprise birthday party and he really WAS surprised.  The problem is, that he has made me promise not to do the same for him when he turned 50.  Nada . . . Nothing . . . . Zilch is what he wants me to do for his birthday.  So what did I do???  Get him a car!!!  Does it mean anything that it is his paycheck that will pay the bill?  Ha!  A silver Miata to match his silver hair!!!  He and I have had a fun time driving it.

I'm one lucky woman to have crossed paths with Lincoln those many years ago.  Isn't life funny?  If he or I had made one little decision differently our lives possibly would have never crossed.  I remember reading in a book that life is like riding a bus.  The bus stops occasionally, opens it doors, and you step out and what you find changes your life forever.  What if you choose or chose to get out at a different stop?  Nobody knows what would happen or would have happened.

Anyhow, I'm getting off subject . . . . .

HaPpY BiRtHdAy Lincoln!

and many more!

(he does want to go out to dinner, which is a change from his normal dinner request of taco salad, which in a way is a gift for McKay and me too!!!)

This one is for posterity

I've been giving my mom piano lessons.  She has been working on one of my favorites she played when she was a kid.  I decided to get up the courage to ask her if I could record her playing it.  It'd be a shame to have her in my home, playing this song, and not have a video!!!  She agreed and was immediately nervous!  It is hard to perform, even for a camera!!

After many "takes" of the video, and laughing together hysterically, I told her "just play!!! it's not going to be perfect!"  It's not perfect (hardly anyone plays perfectly). . . .and I love it!  She has such a great way a making the piano come alive.  So for my siblings, my children and anyone who wants to watch . . . . . here is my mom playing "Swaying Daffodils."

Yay Mom! . . . . . . I think it is great you are polishing up your skills!